An Everlasting Beginning

You know when you have those really tough days for no reason? They happen to all of us. It could be because it was a Monday, because I realized getting back into BYU just isn't a reality for me, because the fact that I am a boomerang kid hit me, or because I stayed up too late the night before, but I had a really tough day last Monday. There isn't much else to it. I had one of those days where whenever my mom or dad looked at me I felt like a failure and tears would come to my eyes, where every little thing annoyed me, and all I wanted to do was sit and watch movies. Like I said, we all have those days. But, it is on those particularly rough days that you have to look around you and just smile because of everything and everyone you are blessed with. For instance, two of my really good friends texted me all day even though I know they are at school and already stressing with their crazy school schedules, homework, and social lives. And you know what? Both of them made me laugh. On that same day my mom and dad showed me how much they loved me. I know both of them wanted me to go back to BYU so badly, but both told me it was okay and that I am meant to go down another path. Those rough days mean tight hugs, emails from Becca, and going to the store to find the two seasons of Downton Abbey that I didn't have yet on sale and mom staying up later than usual to watch an episode with me. It is also on those particular days that you realize no matter how ugly of a crier you are that the spotted dog will always be there to lick away your tears, and the puppy is still too small to get away from your hugs no matter how badly she wants down to play. I am thankful for hard days, because although they really suck, they remind me how blessed I am to have such amazing and loving people in my life.

I am not really having a hard time right now, but sometimes I do miss school and the life I had there. It is an ending, and who likes those? President Uchtdorf said it best: 

There seems to be something inside of us that resists endings. Why is this? Because we are made of the stuff of eternity. We are eternal beings, children of the Almighty God, whose name is Endless and who promises eternal blessings without number. Endings are not our destiny. The more we learn about the gospel of Jesus Christ, the more we realize that endings here in mortality are not endings at all. They are merely interruptions—temporary pauses that one day will seem small compared to the eternal joy awaiting the faithful. How grateful I am to my Heavenly Father that in His plan there are no true endings, only everlasting beginnings.

So, for now I am going to work through this ending because I know there are no true endings. There are only everlasting beginnings.