A Season for Courage

This week has been an odd one. I went in to it full of excitement. It did not take long on Monday (I woke up in a bad mood and stayed that way all day) for me to lose that excitement. By the end of work on Monday, I was tired and ready for it to be Friday once again. Honestly, the only bright moment of my day was when I got to text my little brother through all of my classes and my study group. Yes, I taught him how to make a Homecoming mum through text. At the end he said, "I'm so glad I have a nice sister!" It was a simple statement, but it made me smile. I am genuinely thankful that I get to be his big sister. He drives me insane sometimes, but who else would be my buddy/partner in crime all of the time? It is a blessing for me to have him in my life. Getting to help him pick what he wore today made me smile once again remembering how I help him choose his first day of school outfit every year. It also made me think of all of those shopping trips we force him to go on, but when we get home he is more excited about all of his new clothes than I am about mine (and trust me, I get excited). Okay, there was one other bright moment. My roommates and I had a little too much fun before FHE. What you see is all you get. No questions. 

 Tuesday, Flint (thank heavens I get to work with him. He makes my days brighter) noticed that I was not my usual self. I was burdened by all I had to do this week with three luncheons, a twelve hour day at work on Tuesday, Noondays, Hike and Light the Y, and a meeting on top of school, hope for a social life, and maybe even some sleep. He just hugged me and told me to listen to this talk: Of Things that Matter Most. My grandma tells me to not run faster than I have strength in every letter. I had never notice that until I heard it in my talk and connected it with each time she has told me. I write down all of the advice in her letters... except this one bit. I think this is one of the most important pieces of advice she has given me. I ran too fast, and I got burnt out before I really even started. This talk really helped me feel better. After our luncheon on Tuesday, I changed from my skirt to jeans and then drove a twelve passenger van up and down a mountain for the rest of the night. It was Hike and Light the Y. I was very stressed and uncomfortable at first, but by the end of the night I was driving like a pro. The Y was lit without any problems, and I got to spend some time with Christina. 

 Wednesday was an average day, but I felt so much better. My hair was curled and loosely pulled into a side ponytail, and I was wearing a seersucker skirt, navy button down shirt, sunshine yellow sweater, and even heels. I was put back together again. Today my dad sent me the sweetest text. He always makes me feel like I am the most special girl out there. I was dressed up once again (I love dressing up, but I am so glad I get to wear pants tomorrow) to go to another luncheon. The food wasn't quite as good, but I still enjoyed it and had fun. I had a medium rare steak for the first time. I like my steaks well done. It actually wasn't bad, and I would have eaten all of it if I had something other than a butter knife to cut it with. I still prefer my steaks cooked more, but I will eat them if they have some pink (or red) now. In these two luncheons, I have successfully impressed President Samuelson and Vice President Scharman, and I got them and Sister Samuelson to laugh. Oh my. It makes me so happy. I love all three of them. Also, I got free tickets to BYU Homecoming Spectacular! I have gone every year so far, and was afraid I would miss it this year like I missed the true blue foam. But, I have a wonderful job that has some perks. So, with Jan as my date I headed off to the Marriott tonight. I think this year was better than freshman year when Brian Stokes Mitchell was the guest. Nathan Pacheco with his perfectly fitting navy suit with silk black trim on the collar, skinny black silk tie, and beautiful voice made the everything else fade away. The first song he sang was this:

I had never heard all of the lyrics of this song before, but it is truly beautiful. Nathan Pacheco then told a personal story about when he was on a study abroad in Italy. He wondered how he could make singing a career. While there, he watched a CES devotional. If you want to read the whole talk click here. He said his favorite part was when Elder Holland says, "God expects you to have enough faith and determination and enough trust in Him to keep moving, keep living, keep rejoicing. In fact, He expects you not simply to face the future (that sounds pretty grim and stoic); He expects you to embrace and shape the future—to love it and rejoice in it and delight in your opportunities. God is anxiously waiting for the chance to answer your prayers and fulfill your dreams just as He always has. But He can't if you don't pray, and He can't if you don't dream. In short, He can't if you don't believe." I loved this just as much as he did. It is beautiful. Other performers did their thing from singing to tap dancing, and there were inspirational stories of BYU students some of which made me cry but all of which warmed my heart. These were all wonderful, but my favorite parts were when Nathan Pacheco performed. He did his song "Tears from Heaven" which is my favorite song from his album. Tears from heaven wash me over. Give me shelter from the storm. Daylight is gone, but still I can see somewhere there's a place to keep me warm. Drifting in silence, hear my heart beat, breathing this feeling that I know. If danger and trouble come around me, somewhere there's a place to call my home. Watch over me and I will find my way back home. If in solitude I wander, far away from those I love. If my faith is torn asunder, light my way back through the stars above. Tears from heaven wash me over. Give me shelter from this storm. Daylight is gone, but still I can see light shining bright to guide me home. Watch over me and I will find the way back home. This song was sung after a story was told about two BYU students that got engaged and then hopped in the car with the guy's younger sister and started a long drive back home to tell their parents. It got late and all of them fell asleep. Yep, all of them including the guy who was driving. He woke up to his sister screaming and they were headed straight for a pile of dirt. A bad car wreck ensued. His neck was broken, and his little sister was killed. He had to learn to walk again and had to let go of the guilt he felt before starting his life over and marrying his now wife. It was perfect. Then, Nathan Pacheco got a little choked up telling about how much he loved BYU and getting to come back. To finish the program he sang "Don't Cry" which is another one of my favorites.

I loved getting to go tonight, and being able to go with Janessa made it even better. This was what I needed. I needed the Spirit, the tradition, the honor, the hope, the courage, the joy, the strength, the beauty, the happiness, the energy, and everything else that comes with being here at BYU that I sometimes forget when I get caught up in everything going on. Like President Uchtdorf said, "If life and its rushed pace and many stresses have made it difficult for you to feel like rejoicing, then perhaps now is a good time to refocus on what matters most." 

Oh! And with the help of our amazing mom, my little brother had a beautiful mum to give his "date." He is one good looking kid! Also, I want to point out that I started a trend. Everyone made fun of me in high school when I hung the mum from my neck. Turns out everyone does it now. For the win.