Whoosh, Cecil!

There is a level of admiration, dedication, and respect that goes along with being at BYU that cannot be matched. Today in devotional we had two General Authorities come to speak to us. The first, spoke lovingly about his days at BYU, the importance of his wife to him and the eternal love he had for her, and the power of the Holy Ghost in our lives. That was a beautiful talk, and I almost wished it could have gone on longer. When he sat down, President Eyring stood at the podium. With a smile, he stood and spoke of the service that President Cecil Samuelson and his wife have given for eleven years. We all knew what was coming. Quickly looking at Sister Samuelson, I saw tears welling in her eyes, and they quickly came to mine. As President Eyring released President Samuelson from duty, it was all I could do to keep the tears from dropping into my lap. President and Sister Samuelson have done an amazing job, and I am proud to say I was at BYU during their service. As President Eyring finished what he had to say (calling a new president) and sat down, the Marriott Center was completely silent. There was not a cough or a sniffle. Even the typing of reporters had stopped. The closing prayer was said, and BYU students amazed me once again. Everyone stood and with a reverence that, as I have said before, could only be witnessed at BYU gave President and Sister Samuelson a standing ovation. President Samuelson who had stayed stone-faced thus far gave in and the tears came to him as well, so I don't feel as bad about my tears. I will never forget that moment. The moment that you think would take away the spirit from the room but only expounded upon it. The moment when nothing and everything changed for BYU. I will always love, respect, and admire the Samuelsons. I am so thankful for them. I know President Worthen will do an outstanding job as well, but I am glad I could be here when the Samuelsons were. So, President and Sister Samuelson, Cecil and Sharon, thank you. Thank you for upholding the standards of this university that I love so much. Thank you for dedicating your lives to it even though you were University of Utah graduates. Thank you for looking out for the students here. Thank you for watching out for me. Thank you for the devotionals, luncheons, tickets to the President’s Box for the Texas game, and of course for letting us yell, “Whoosh, Cecil!!” at the basketball game with the players made a free throw. Thank you for all you did, and thank you for being you.

Oscars: For the Win

I love the Oscars. I never actually watch them, but I love watching the recaps and looking at all of the pictures with the beautiful dresses. Here are a few of my favorites for a fashionable Friday! 

 Almost as outrageous as Lady Gaga's dress, yet somehow she still pulls it off and looks great. 

 Oh my so beautiful. Flowing, icy, beauty. 

 Different but elegant. 

 J Law. I love her. And her fiery peplum dress. 

 Sandra Bullock... Can I just say she will be beautiful and classy (and probably sassy) until the day she dies? 

 Kate Hudson. I think she may have been the winner of the evening. Wow. 

And last but not least, Julia Roberts. Who doesn't love a classic black dress?! 

Here is my favorite performance of the evening. The song. The dress inspired by the ruby slippers. Heaven.

Listen to it here! Sorry, I couldn't find a good video of it.

But guys, let's not forget the true star of the show this year. As beautiful as everyone was, only one could give a ten minute monologue making everyone laugh the entire time with her sarcasm, order pizza, go around asking for money to tip the pizza boy, come out at one point wearing a "Glinda the Good" costume, miss one of her cues, pop up between Sandra Bullock and Leo DiCaprio and have both of them bust up laughing, and of course, crash Twitter with a single selfie that was retweeted over 13 million times. Dear Ellen. The more I see of her the more I love her. I don't necessarily approve of what she stands for, but she is funny.

A Season for Courage

This week has been an odd one. I went in to it full of excitement. It did not take long on Monday (I woke up in a bad mood and stayed that way all day) for me to lose that excitement. By the end of work on Monday, I was tired and ready for it to be Friday once again. Honestly, the only bright moment of my day was when I got to text my little brother through all of my classes and my study group. Yes, I taught him how to make a Homecoming mum through text. At the end he said, "I'm so glad I have a nice sister!" It was a simple statement, but it made me smile. I am genuinely thankful that I get to be his big sister. He drives me insane sometimes, but who else would be my buddy/partner in crime all of the time? It is a blessing for me to have him in my life. Getting to help him pick what he wore today made me smile once again remembering how I help him choose his first day of school outfit every year. It also made me think of all of those shopping trips we force him to go on, but when we get home he is more excited about all of his new clothes than I am about mine (and trust me, I get excited). Okay, there was one other bright moment. My roommates and I had a little too much fun before FHE. What you see is all you get. No questions. 

 Tuesday, Flint (thank heavens I get to work with him. He makes my days brighter) noticed that I was not my usual self. I was burdened by all I had to do this week with three luncheons, a twelve hour day at work on Tuesday, Noondays, Hike and Light the Y, and a meeting on top of school, hope for a social life, and maybe even some sleep. He just hugged me and told me to listen to this talk: Of Things that Matter Most. My grandma tells me to not run faster than I have strength in every letter. I had never notice that until I heard it in my talk and connected it with each time she has told me. I write down all of the advice in her letters... except this one bit. I think this is one of the most important pieces of advice she has given me. I ran too fast, and I got burnt out before I really even started. This talk really helped me feel better. After our luncheon on Tuesday, I changed from my skirt to jeans and then drove a twelve passenger van up and down a mountain for the rest of the night. It was Hike and Light the Y. I was very stressed and uncomfortable at first, but by the end of the night I was driving like a pro. The Y was lit without any problems, and I got to spend some time with Christina. 

 Wednesday was an average day, but I felt so much better. My hair was curled and loosely pulled into a side ponytail, and I was wearing a seersucker skirt, navy button down shirt, sunshine yellow sweater, and even heels. I was put back together again. Today my dad sent me the sweetest text. He always makes me feel like I am the most special girl out there. I was dressed up once again (I love dressing up, but I am so glad I get to wear pants tomorrow) to go to another luncheon. The food wasn't quite as good, but I still enjoyed it and had fun. I had a medium rare steak for the first time. I like my steaks well done. It actually wasn't bad, and I would have eaten all of it if I had something other than a butter knife to cut it with. I still prefer my steaks cooked more, but I will eat them if they have some pink (or red) now. In these two luncheons, I have successfully impressed President Samuelson and Vice President Scharman, and I got them and Sister Samuelson to laugh. Oh my. It makes me so happy. I love all three of them. Also, I got free tickets to BYU Homecoming Spectacular! I have gone every year so far, and was afraid I would miss it this year like I missed the true blue foam. But, I have a wonderful job that has some perks. So, with Jan as my date I headed off to the Marriott tonight. I think this year was better than freshman year when Brian Stokes Mitchell was the guest. Nathan Pacheco with his perfectly fitting navy suit with silk black trim on the collar, skinny black silk tie, and beautiful voice made the everything else fade away. The first song he sang was this:

I had never heard all of the lyrics of this song before, but it is truly beautiful. Nathan Pacheco then told a personal story about when he was on a study abroad in Italy. He wondered how he could make singing a career. While there, he watched a CES devotional. If you want to read the whole talk click here. He said his favorite part was when Elder Holland says, "God expects you to have enough faith and determination and enough trust in Him to keep moving, keep living, keep rejoicing. In fact, He expects you not simply to face the future (that sounds pretty grim and stoic); He expects you to embrace and shape the future—to love it and rejoice in it and delight in your opportunities. God is anxiously waiting for the chance to answer your prayers and fulfill your dreams just as He always has. But He can't if you don't pray, and He can't if you don't dream. In short, He can't if you don't believe." I loved this just as much as he did. It is beautiful. Other performers did their thing from singing to tap dancing, and there were inspirational stories of BYU students some of which made me cry but all of which warmed my heart. These were all wonderful, but my favorite parts were when Nathan Pacheco performed. He did his song "Tears from Heaven" which is my favorite song from his album. Tears from heaven wash me over. Give me shelter from the storm. Daylight is gone, but still I can see somewhere there's a place to keep me warm. Drifting in silence, hear my heart beat, breathing this feeling that I know. If danger and trouble come around me, somewhere there's a place to call my home. Watch over me and I will find my way back home. If in solitude I wander, far away from those I love. If my faith is torn asunder, light my way back through the stars above. Tears from heaven wash me over. Give me shelter from this storm. Daylight is gone, but still I can see light shining bright to guide me home. Watch over me and I will find the way back home. This song was sung after a story was told about two BYU students that got engaged and then hopped in the car with the guy's younger sister and started a long drive back home to tell their parents. It got late and all of them fell asleep. Yep, all of them including the guy who was driving. He woke up to his sister screaming and they were headed straight for a pile of dirt. A bad car wreck ensued. His neck was broken, and his little sister was killed. He had to learn to walk again and had to let go of the guilt he felt before starting his life over and marrying his now wife. It was perfect. Then, Nathan Pacheco got a little choked up telling about how much he loved BYU and getting to come back. To finish the program he sang "Don't Cry" which is another one of my favorites.

I loved getting to go tonight, and being able to go with Janessa made it even better. This was what I needed. I needed the Spirit, the tradition, the honor, the hope, the courage, the joy, the strength, the beauty, the happiness, the energy, and everything else that comes with being here at BYU that I sometimes forget when I get caught up in everything going on. Like President Uchtdorf said, "If life and its rushed pace and many stresses have made it difficult for you to feel like rejoicing, then perhaps now is a good time to refocus on what matters most." 

Oh! And with the help of our amazing mom, my little brother had a beautiful mum to give his "date." He is one good looking kid! Also, I want to point out that I started a trend. Everyone made fun of me in high school when I hung the mum from my neck. Turns out everyone does it now. For the win.

Life is Crazily in Love with Us

"No matter how upside-down it all temporarily appear, we will have no fear because we know this secret: Life is crazily in love with us--wildly and innocently in love with us. The universe always gives us exactly what we need, exactly when we need it." -Rob Brezny

I am averaging two assignments due a day... I have had two quizzes, a test, signed up for a test, have another piece of art to do, a seven page paper to write, and a presentation to give. With that being said, I am not letting anything detract from my fun. Yes, my car has been booted because the top was down and you couldn't see the sticker. Yes, I did freak out at first but after the guy being rude to me more than once I set my landlady on him. Yes, I feel bad for the poor guy, but at the same time I feel like he deserved it. I got out of that. I have hiked the Y with Emilee and saw a gorgeous sunset, I have been on multiple walks, gone to Seven Peaks (I got to show Dani and Mak the ropes on their first excursion), went to FHE which was a concert in the park (not really a concert...), and I have spent a lot of time with friends. Going to sleep before two has become a foreign concept to me since last Friday... Also, I have found out it is next to impossible for my friends and me to get a good picture the first time, and I now know how to analyze my dreams (my life makes so much more sense now!). 

I would also like to say that Humanities is almost my favorite class I have ever taken at BYU. It is a close second only to Brother Smith's Book of Mormon class. I love it. If it were a useful major I would switch. If I could afford it, I would go on a Humanities study abroad with my teacher in a heartbeat. I mean, what other class could get me to joyfully attend Utah symphony, Utah opera, and make me want to go on a study abroad to Europe only to see paintings? I really love the class. I have even found a painting I want in my future home. It is by Caravaggio. It is of Mary holding Christ. Christ is about one year old, and it looks like Mary has just gotten him out of bed because there are people there wanting to see him. The amazing thing about the painting is these people. They seem to be poor, humble people. The items closest to the viewer are the feet of these people. Dirty feet. Feet that have walked an unknowable distance just to see Christ. I love it. I want it. I just love the class. Even paintings I used to hate are seen in a new light. 

I have also been writing a lot of letters lately. From missionaries to grandparents to friends. I have written them all. Letters have gone everywhere from Ohio to Germany to Texas to Argentina. Looking at pictures and reading blogs has become another hobby. I love hearing how well all of my friends are doing on their missions and seeing paintings my grandma has done (I like to think I started her up again. She didn't paint for a long time, I asked her for one, and now she is painting again!). I may still be confused by certain events, but I am having so much fun here at BYU. 

I am like the moon. Half of me is always hidden... Except when I am with my friends and the crazy, adventurous, competitive girl comes out. Oh! And... arm update. The bruise is almost gone, but it still hurts when I sleep on it or someone comes up to me and grabs it or bumps it. It really is a lot better now though! You can only see the bruise if you are really looking for it. I no longer look like an abused child. So, life is crazily in love with me, and I am crazily in love with it. 

Brought to You by BYUSA

Like I said, last night was our Leadership Ceremony. Before we went, Andrew and I met up to go and watch the basketball game. Baylor was a worthy opponent and Matty F. Carlino, B. Dave, and Craigory Cusick the 15th just didn't pull through. We were winning until Andrew and I stopped watching together so we could go get ready. 

Then came the ceremony. I knew I would get an award. Don't get me wrong it isn't like I expected it, but Eric and Angela have been being so suspicious. Eric wouldn't even let me help set up which is unheard of. I picked out the flowers for the floral arrangements, and that is it. He took me with him like he always does but I sat there and watched. Anyways, Andrew makes me so happy. Yesterday he asked me what my favorite color was. I told him it depended on what it was for, but I really loved sunshine yellow. So, at the event he wore a yellow tie. We had fun eating, talking, and dodging Angela with the camera. Then, the video yearbook started. I am in half the pictures! How did that even happen?!
 After that, they passed out the awards, each with an explanation as to why this person received the award. I nominated one of my School Spirit girls for Optimism. She got it! Way to go Mckenzie! Kennedy got one for inclusiveness. She by far deserved that one. I thought I was fine when they got to the last one, and then Eric got up there. Andrew just looked at me and smiled. Eric read his part, and I was almost in tears. I got the Dedication award. Then, he called my name, Andrew nudged me, and I went up to accept my award. He gave it to me and we took a picture. Once we walked off the stage we hugged. I really am going to miss my big brother when he gets married and leaves. When it was all over, everyone came to hug me, I got a letter from the new Executive Vice President whom I have never met but really like, and we took a ton of pictures. I dropped Andrew off at his apartment so he could do his homework that I am pretty sure I have been distracting him from for the past couple weeks. I am so glad he came with me. 

After getting home I was kind of in a happy daze for a little while. I went to my old roommates' to talk to them. We ended up talking about boys which didn't help me out of my daze at all. I went back to my apartment to work on homework and read scriptures. Then, Andrew and I started texting. That boy can make me grin from ear to ear within .001 seconds. Reading a couple chapters in my scriptures usually takes about five minutes. It took me 15 last night. Our conversations are really funny, and when I go back and read them I realize if it wasn't me in this situation, I would think it was kind of mushy. Right as I was going to bed I put my phone down and got comfortable. When my phone buzzed again I knew it was him. I let out a little, "He!" My roommate burst out laughing and we laughed for a good five minutes. 

Eric also texted me telling me congratulations and how honored he was to present my award. I told him I only learned from the best and I wouldn't have wanted anyone else to present it to me (which is genuinely true). This morning I woke up to a text telling me he appreciated it, but I was like that last year and that is why he wanted me to serve this year. I went into my eight o'clock class and my teacher told me I was radiating light. We were talking about happiness and families and he told everyone to turn around and look at me if they needed to see what happiness looked like. When class was over he pulled me aside and told me I was far too happy to be in an eight o'clock class. Honestly, when I woke up this morning I had to ask myself if this was real life. It is! 

I thank all of my BYUSA friends for all of the tears, hugs, smiles, and laughs we have shared. I am going to miss it, but I am excited to see the some of the changes that will come. There is one other thing I will always remember... Pinkies up!

Interview and Retreat

Let me just say that Friday did not start in the best way when I was still awake at two in the morning to receive a text telling me that they forgot to call me about my BYUSA interview and it was 3:30 that day. It continued to not be the best when I was still awake at three to respond to it and then stayed awake until six to continue to stress about it. I finally fell asleep at six but had to wake up at seven... After going to my classes, I had to come home to get a cold shower. I was burning hot from being so stressed. I called my mom and prayed everything would go well. As I walked into the office so did my friend Angela. She is so cute and she helped me calm down a little, but going into my interview, I was still shaking. I answered every question they threw at me well. The only problem was both of the people interviewing me acted like they thought I sat around and did nothing all day making me unqualified for the position. By the time I got out of there I was on the brink of tears from anxiety, and I was pretty mad. I talked to Eric about it who talked to Angela who went and talked to (reprimanded) the interviewers. Apparently they already have someone in mind (a friend) for the position. I probably will not get my BYUSA position, but I did everything in my power to be the best candidate for the position. Apparently it isn't who is the most qualified who gets the job. Oh well. In my brink of tears state, Austin noticed and asked if I wanted to feel better. I did of course, so he played a few hymns on his  guitar and sang along for me. It did bring a smile to my face. Later on, another girl the interviewers were rather rude to came out flustered. Austin and I walked up to her and just stayed in a group hug for a little while. I got multiple hugs throughout the day. Apparently I just looked distraught. I did not have much time to completely worry about it. I had a retreat to carry out. It was so much fun but kind of stressful in the beginning. As the night wore on, I felt better and better. Games, wonderful trainings, a good dinner, and only the best people to be surrounded by. At one point I ran upstairs to read my scriptures for five minutes. I came across the scripture Mosiah 8:18- "Thus God has provided a means that man, through faith, might work mighty miracles, therefore he becometh a great benefit to his fellow beings." It is a miracle how involved I have become in BYUSA this year. I went from being the invisible girl to being the girl most people know. Then, right as I finished reading one of the committee members came and sat on the bed with me. She looked at me and told me that it was because of my warm smile, bright eyes, and beautiful personality that she became involved in BYUSA and felt like she belonged here at BYU. I love her. After another long hug, we went downstairs to join the party. We were about to do skits. My coordinator, Angela, and I were judges, and they were all so funny. They ranged from songs to impromptu to telling the truth and kind of making fun of all of the areas in the office. By the end Angela and I were gasping for air and were crying from laughing so hard. Then came the slideshow. We all curled up on the couches together and started at the beginning of our journey. By the end of that we once again had tears in our eyes but this time it wasn't from laughter. Our journey is coming to a close. For a few of us, that was our last retreat. To brighten the mood once again ice cream sandwiches and "Just Dance" were brought out. After watching Eric finally playing Just Dance at one in the morning I decided it was time for bed. My day had been full of mixed emotions. I decided it may have started out as badly as it possibly could but I would let it end in the best way possible. This morning I woke up early to make everyone breakfast, and we had one more training before it was time to leave. After talking to a friend from home and my mom and dad, taking a long nap, and writing my talk, I am turning in for the night. The time is far spent. I am done. Tomorrow starts a new week.