When in Rome... or Texas

Finals came and went in a blur along with Kaitlyn's bridal shower (the first one I had ever thrown) and the days leading up to me coming home. The day before I left, I went out for a sushi lunch with Julie Anne. Oh my. I never thought I would be so full from rice and a little bit of seafood, but three rolls later I could not have eaten the second round of three that they offer you for your "all you can eat" lunch. I don't think all of the laughing we were doing was helping my very full stomach feel any better either. I love her. Then, it was time for me to go home.

I needed to go home. I love Provo but sometimes the simpleness and monotony of the lifestyle I have here get old. I get tired of my schedule of school and work. As much as I love the people here it makes me sad when they all leave whether it is because of missions, marriages, or moving on with their lives. I needed a change. Once finals were over, I was out of Provo. It felt so good to see my family again, to get those tight hugs that mean so much, to be able to eat at my favorite places, and to see people I love.

The first weekend I was at home I got to walk a 5K with my momma. Her team at work had these shirts... On the front they said, "I pooped today." I'll be the first to admit that I was a little embarrassed to be wearing that shirt. I told her if I was going to wear that shirt I was going to look dang good doing it. Armed with new running shoes and matching shorts, I walked that 5K as quickly as I could. Afterwards, mom and I went down a giant blowup slide, drew on the sidewalk with chalk, and just had fun before going out to eat with some of her friends she from work. The next day was Sunday. I missed Easter with my family, but they made me the Easter dinner that I wanted so badly. Yum. Can you work food off ahead of time? Let's go with yes so I can say I worked all of the potato salad and blackberry cobbler I ate that day at the 5K.

My time at home flew by. Even the days I was bored at home while mom worked seem to go by so quickly. I don't really understand why or how. Shopping, errands, cooking dinner, cleaning out the house, starting Gone With the Wind, seeing how bad I am at video games, and other random activities filled up my time. Over my break I also had a birthday. I am no longer a teenager! My birthday was wonderful, and I got everything I asked for including sandals, nail polish, skirts, and a couple of books. I am such a girl. For my birthday I also got a lemon meringue pie made by my dad, and I got pictures in the bluebonnets. Mom and I actually found a good patch of them on the way to a friend from our old ward's house. At her house we went through a friend that died's jewelry box. As hard and sad as that was, I am glad to have a part of her to always remember her by.

I loved every minute I got to spend with my family whether it was eating dinner, watching a movie, going on walks with the dog and looking at the peacocks that live in our neighborhood, shopping, exploring antique stores, getting smoothies, or laughing with Ryan because I really am so terrible at my Mario games now. I love them even though they drive me crazy and I am sure I drive them crazy as well. That's what families are for, right?!?

As time got closer for me to come back to Provo, I got more upset and stressed. I was so sad that I had to go back, and even more upset that my last few days would not be spent with my family as much as with others. I had fun on those days though for the most part. My week started with class drama. Things can never go the way you plan. I got it all worked out with some help.

When I'm at home I always just wish I had more time. Mom did a bridal shower for Kaitlyn. The theme was breakfast at Tiffany's. I thought it was cute. The little old ladies from the ward made it even cuter. The next day, I went shopping and then to lunch with my grandma and grandpa. My poor grandpa. First we take him shopping where he is the designated bag holder, and then we take him to a restaurant where there are no milkshakes. The more time I am at college, the more I appreciate my grandparents. They bought me a beautiful shirt, and lunch was divine.

The next day I went to lunch with my best friend and her mom. I love and miss the both of them so much. Having them in my life ever since I was in kindergarten means the world to me. By the end of lunch I was a little stressed because I had to drive somewhere I didn't know in the rain to meet with Eric and Maddie who drove from Houston to see me. I miss them so much. So, so much. I met them and then we drove to the town square at Southlake for lunch and exploring. It is beautiful there, and my lunch of a giant chicken wrap was delicious. Most of all, I loved their company. I loved laughing like we used to.

Friday came all too soon and was Kaitlyn's wedding day. I have been waiting for this day for far too long! At the temple I waited anxiously for them to come out. While I waited, I talked to friends from my ward. It was Kaitlyn's wedding day, but everyone told me how beautiful I looked in my bridesmaid dress. I even had one lady tell me my eyes were mesmerizing. That always makes a girl feel good. When they finally came out, they were so happy. Picture time soon followed!  Once I was back home and out of my heels, I was happy to scarf down some food and watch a show with my mom. I don't know what I am going to do when I get married. I may starve to death and then die from lack of sleep or hurting feet on my wedding day... Anyways, then it was reception time! The church was decorated beautifully, and the bride and groom were still glowing with happiness. The bridesmaids and groomsmen made a survival kit of sorts for Kaitlyn and James. Each went up and gave the bride or groom two items to help the new bride or groom survive with the other. When I was done with my part, I went back to sit down. My mom told me I sounded just like my Aunt Diana. That made me so happy. The reception was entertaining, but when I got home at ten I could have slept for days. Too bad (but not too bad at all) I went out with my mom and a couple cousins and an aunt to get cheese fries and fried pickles. Mom and I came home and tried to watch a movie. I knew I wasn't going to fall asleep so at two in the morning I turned it off and went to bed and got to sleep with my mom and the spotted dog.

Sadly, the next day I had to leave. Since my flight was later my family had time for one more breakfast together. After that, spending time with my mom, and walking the dog one more time, we went to the airport. I swear, airports and I do not get along. I ALWAYS have to be patted down, my hands are tested for bomb residue or whatever else they swab my hands for, or my bags are opened and searched through. This time was no different. Annoying. I got to the gate just as we were boarding, and I got to sit by a skinny person unlike on the way to Texas. Someone in heaven loves me.

Now I am back in Provo. Back to college life. Back to remembering how I wanted things to be but facing how they have turned out. Back to worrying about what job I will be able to get when I graduate and what I should master in. My mom once told me that if I wanted to make God laugh I should tell Him my plans. He probably can't even look at me without laughing now. My plans never work out. He must have something completely different in mind for me. I may one day understand that and find out what they are. Until then I have to remember that some days life is all about your dreams, hopes, and vision for the future, but in others life is just about putting one foot in front of the other.

Do I Dare?

"Do I dare disturb the universe? In a minute there is time for decisions and revisions which a minute will reverse."
T.S. Eliot

Do I dare disturb the universe and say that finals weren't that bad this semester? I am exhausted, but I did well on all of my tests. That isn't normal. Could it be because for the first time I realized certain bricks of the testing center are carved with a crest and say "knowledge is power"? Could it be because I have had ice cream for three days in a row and polished off a bag of peanut butter M&Ms in a week? Could it be because I made going to the temple a priority and went with Meghan ten weeks in a row? I don't know. And honestly, I don't care if I disturb the universe. I definitely do dare! Thanks for reading, but I am going to watch a romantic movie and sleep now. 

This is Freakin' Awesome

Finals are here. I have already taken one. All my papers are finished, I have been trained for my internship, and only four tests stand in my way of going home. You would think this is a time to complain about those four tests, but let me put a spin on things. Plot twist! This week is awesome. Yesterday was my graduation luncheon. My favorite teacher, Dr. Erin Holmes was the speaker. I absolutely adore her. Yesterday was also Unforum. The name is dumb, but it was fantastic. The theme was "Explore Your Potential." Oddly perfect for my time here at BYU. Men's chorus karaoke, Vocal Point, and one last Whoosh for Cecil made me smile from ear to ear. How much fun! President Samuelson shared a line from a poem by Wadsworth. It goes, " The heights by great men reached and kept were not attained in sudden flight but, they while their companions slept, they were toiling upwards in the night." I thought that was applicable as we head into finals week. After my final class of the semester, it really hit me. College is coming to a close... It kind of makes me sad and scared, but I am so dang excited! I went home to take my first final and then... I went to a concert. Andy Grammer. Oh my. Love. That is all. Well, maybe not all. He sang one song that has a bad word in it. He stopped singing when it came to that word and let us fill it in. We are at BYU. We of course all yelled "freakin" in unison. He thought that was so great and amazingly funny. He said, "Now wait...you all just shouted 'freakin' in unison. That was awesome!" He loved it. I loved it. After the concert we may have gone to get ice cream and french fries. Today I had mixed feelings about going into work. I was tired from being up a little too late last night, but I also hate goodbyes. A lot. I said goodbye to the officers today. One I will see over the summer in the BYUSA office, and one I will have to still work with until I leave. I hope I stay in touch with the rest of them. I love them. This was the first year of my college career to not be in BYUSA. It was weird and hard at first, but the officers made it easier. I had so much fun with them. They made my job incredible, and I enjoyed it almost as much as I did BYUSA which I didn't think to be possible. Here's to a happy finals week everyone!

Let's be real. I could post all of Andy Grammer's songs on here. Fine By Me, Forever, Keep Your Head Up, Miss Me, Crazy Beautiful, and so many more!

Create the Highest, Grandest Vision Possible For Your Life Because You Become What You Believe

It is now 2014. It is so weird to think about since a few weeks ago I accidentally wrote 2011 on one of my papers without realizing it until my teacher pointed it out. Oops... It's a new year, a time to start again, a time to stop thinking about what you are going to do and start doing it, a time to live your life and be who you are, a time to forget about what happened in 2013 and move on, and a time to take risks and make the most of life. 2013 is a year that I was happy to wave goodbye to. It has been a long one that I don't think I was prepared for but grew to understand and appreciate. It just continued to show me how nothing goes the way we plan. In 2013 I had my first kiss, first boyfriend, one of my best friends got married, I was heartbroken, I got to go sailing, I had three beautiful roommates get married, my puppy died, my bunny died, I took a risk and applied for an internship in Ghana, I developed a severe case of wanderlust, I went home twice, my great-grandma passed away, I got to go see Wicked which is just beautiful, I had so many adventures, made new friends, drove through blizzards, sat in the President's Loge with apostles for the BYU/TX game in which BYU won, decorated the Alumni Christmas tree which won a campus-wide competition and was on TV, went to California for the first time, made my first and second solo rode trips, got an amazing job with the Alumni Association and work with the best people, dropped my cousin off at the MTC, moved apartments, watched a Pioneer Day parade (oh Utah...), went on a trip to Washington with some friends, turned 19, realized I like fry sauce and a million other things I never gave a chance before, was completely covered in glitter, and so much more! It was wonderful and hard. I guess those two things are a package deal. Without one we would not have the other. 

As the semester was coming to a close my some of my roommates and I went to Temple Square to see the beautiful lights. I also went to Thanksgiving Point with Kaitlyn, James, and Julie Anne to see the lights there. I thought it sounded beautiful to be able to stay in my warm car as I drove through them after freezing in Salt Lake. But, we ended up putting the top down to see them better. It was still fun and the coco afterwards made it even better. And... There were reindeer and so many fun things to see! Also before finals we had to throw Dani a bachelorette party. Now, I live in Provo with a bunch of Mormons so don't let your mind go all crazy thinking of what we did. We went to dinner and she opened gifts. Fun but not too insane. Finals were beastly. I only did poorly on one final, and it was my last one (by that point I kind of just give up). When I looked at the test that was supposed to be dates, names, a map, and places, I saw only names. One hundred and fifty names to be exact that I had to match with what they did. Yeah right, but at least I asked for all of the right finals this time! That was a nightmare last year... I got good grades this semester.Going home was something I was excited and nervous about. When I walk in the door I usually go straight for the couch that Fenway slept on. It was odd not doing that. The house felt a little empty without his snoring or the bonks you heard when he ran into something. I just miss him so much. Being at home consisted of shopping trips, appointments, outings with Ryan, eating seafood and Tex-Mex, baking, talks with my mom and dad, being tormented by my loving little brother, musicals, and outing with my best friend, and movies! I love seeing my family. Sometimes I wish I went to college closer to home so I could see them more. Then, I go home and get sat on by Ryan who is HUGE, and I remember why BYU is the place for me. Christmas was a good one even without the "Christmas Day Fenway." Momma got sick around New Year's Eve. I felt so bad, but I was happy to make breakfast in bed for her. Going back to Utah was sadder and harder than it ever has been before. Now I am back... I don't know if I am ready for this new year. I graduate this year! I graduate in seven months and ten days. I guess I can take whatever this year throws at me. Bring it on, 2014! Bring it on....

 P.S. If you didn't know sock monkeys scare me. My best friend (pictured above) and her mom think it is hilarious so each Christmas I get something to add to my collection. I got THE socks this year. They are eating me...