I just got back from a remarkable leadership conference BYU puts on called Foundations of Leadership. Last year I went as a participant, and this year I was able to go as a peer mentor. Now, I would like to start off by truthfully saying that beforehand I was NOT looking forward to this at all. I had an amazing peer mentor last year, and I made myself feel like I could never stand up to my own expectations of what a peer mentor should be like, and in turn, would not be able to relax, enjoy myself, and be able to be spiritually enlightening for my participants. Here's the thing though. In reading through the talks that I had to teach lessons on, I came across a couple quotes that hit me hard. First: "You have great expectations... as the result of a known benefactor, even our Heavenly Father, and great things are expected of you." Wow. Ok. I knew I had great expectations. People always tell me that. Way to put the pressure on. Then came the next quote. "The call for courage comes constantly to each of us. It has ever been so, and so shall it ever be." I knew the real thing that was holding me back was fear. No big deal. I just had to step it up. Then, came the last one. "If we lose our vision of our potential we might fall short of our possibilities." I had lost sight of what I could do by comparing myself to someone else. I am not that person. I am me. This is when I realized I could do this, and I was going to have fun.
Last week, I got an awful sinus infection. I seriously thought it was the worst one I have ever had. It hurt to move. I can honestly say I believe in miracles. I have never been able to get over a sinus infection in a week, even with antibiotics. This time I only had some advil and cough medicine. I knew I would not be going to FOL if I did not get better. I did not really give myself any rest because I always had things to do. I prayed that I would be able to get over it and be able to go to FOL. I know that with the power of prayer I was able to get over it. I needed to be at FOL not only for the group that I was over, but I needed to be there for me. I know of the power of prayer. Like I said, I was really nervous about going to this conference. It is so far beyond my comfort zone, thinking about it now scares me still. I prayed every day that my Heavenly Father would grant me the courage to be able to teach by the spirit and help these incoming freshmen know they will never be alone. College is a scary place sometimes, and I hope I got my point that not only will I be there if they call but there Heavenly Father is always there. Teaching lessons, I was not nervous. I was a leader.
Going through activities, speakers, a ropes course, outdoor and water activities, dances, and so much more made my experience a great one. My group thought I was dating the guy I work with in BYUSA because he was always with me, they said he and I were a cute couple before they found out we aren't dating, they thought I should marry my co-counselor, and they had no idea that I was younger than every single one of them. They all thought I was twenty or twenty-one. So funny.
Last night, we had the night adventure. We blindfold all of the participants in our group and make them hold hands. We lead them through obstacles that got progressively harder (in one group, a couple of kids fell off a cliff. No one was hurt, and it is a funny story to tell, but I think it made a better effect). At the end, we split them all up, leaving them alone in the darkness. My co-counselor and I started singing (yes, I actually sang), and one by one they all worked their way towards us. We then compared it to the scripture story of the shepard and the sheep knowing his voice. They were in the dark, but they knew our voices so they made their way toward us. I know that if we listen, we will hear the voice of the Spirit telling us what we need to hear. We are all sons and daughters of God, and he will not leave us alone and helpless. He is always there for each and every one of us. By listening to the promptings of the spirit today, I was able to listen to one of the best speakers with a talk I felt was just for me. It was about discovering your own hidden potential. He gave us a quote that said, "I am not looking for the BEST players, I am looking for the RIGHT players." I want to be ready to serve when someone needs me not because I am the best one for the job but because I am the right one for it.
Today we were each given a wood board. On one side we wrote our goals for the year on it. On the other side, we wrote fears or obstacles of us reaching those goals. We were then told to break our boards with only our hands. Last year, I was not able to do it. I had to use my foot. This year I was not going to let my fear of inadequacy keep me from breaking my board. My co-counselor held it, we took our stances, and in one HARD blow I broke my wood board into three clean cut pieces. No, not just two. Three. Way to be. I have to admit, I am kind of proud.
I believe leadership is something we grow into. I believe by going to this conference and stepping out of my comfort zone, I grew into a leader more the past three days than I have ever before. President Spencer W. Kimball once said, "Greatness is not always a matter of size or scale, but of the quality of one's life. If we do well with our talents and with the opportunities given them, even more will be given." I know that by sharing my talents over the course of this conference, I was given even more talents and blessings as well. Here is one more quote. This is my favorite one I heard at the conference. "Every person radiates what he or she is." -Bruce C. Hafen
If every person radiates what they are, I hope I can always radiate happiness and light. Even if it is just with a simple smile, I want to brighten someone's day. I want to be the kind of leader that is in the middle of the group helping people along the way rather than the one that is in front only hoping people will follow or the one behind that pushes people until they stand against it. I want to be the leader that leads tirelessly, lovingly, and effectively.
I have a testimony of the power of prayer. I know Heavenly Father is always there for us wanting to help us if we are but willing to ask. I have a testimony of the truthfulness of the Gospel. I know my church is true and that there is a prophet on the earth today, President Monson. I have a testimony of the power of friendship and how important it is in the grand scheme of things. I also have a testimony of the power of courage. President Monson said, "Life's journey is not traveled on a freeway devoid of obstacles, pitfalls, and snares. Rather, it is marked by forks and turnings. Decisions are constantly before us. To make them wisely, courage is needed: the courage to say no, the courage to say yes. Decisions do determine destiny." We have to have courage to make the right decisions to bless the lives of others as well as our own. I am so thankful for the ordinances that allow me to live with my family forever. I know they are there along with my friends to help me make the right decisions that will help lead me back to my Heavenly Father. I am thankful that I was able to go to this conference. I truly believe it helped me grasp how divine my potential is more firmly than ever before, and I have faith that one day I will be able to fulfill those expectations that have been put on me by my friends, family, and most of all, my Father in Heaven.