Deep Thoughts During Thunderstorms

I live in Texas. Texas has thunderstorms. These thunderstorms are serious. These are the kinds where your house shakes, the lightning looks like a laser light show, and they go on for what seems like forever. My poor dog is scared to death of these storms, but for the eight and a half years we have had her I have learned how to deal with her during them. There are a few things you have to do to make her feel better and actually let you sleep:

1. I always play my "calming" playlist on my ipod when I am going to bed, but tonight I have it louder. It helps drown out some of the noise from the storm.
2. I turned on my lava lamp full of glitter so she can't see the lighting as easily and won't be so disturbed by the sudden flashes.
3. She needs constant contact. You cannot just you touch her. She has to be on you or you on her. I was trying to go to sleep, and she came and laid on my face. At that point I remembered how scared she was of these storms so I went to work on getting all of this done. The last step is to get her comfortable (she lays on a pillow and you cover her with a blanket) and then you have to practically lay on her.

This got me thinking. Life is like the thunderstorm. Our calming playlist is the gospel. When we focus on the scriptures and what we are supposed to be doing, we forget about the raging storm around us. We tune out everything around us that is not important and we focus more on the things that we need to in order to end in our final destination... heaven by the side of our Heavenly Father. 
Next is the glowing lava lamp. There are things in this world that add beauty to life if we only turn them on. There is almost always a storm in our world. When you turn on the news you hear nothing but bad things happening. Things flash across the TV or computer screen that try to distract us from our end goal. All we have to do to turn on our sparkle. We need to keep our testimonies strong in order to remain strong when the sudden flashes or unexpected turns in our life occur. People always tell me that I have a certain light about me. At times I can feel that light fading, but when I work hard to do the right thing it burns brighter day by day. We must always remember to turn on our sparkle and work our hardest to keep it on. It may even make the pathway brighter for someone else along the way.
The last thing is the constant contact. Sometimes we feel so alone with the storm raging more than ever. The funny thing is, we are never alone. Heavenly Father is always there for us. Christ made the ultimate sacrifice for us. I learned a lot in my Book of Mormon class last semester, but the thing that hit me the hardest was the lesson about the atonement. My teacher pointed out that Christ suffered for our sins as well as our infirmities. Now, I always thought that meant if we were sick or something, but in reality it means anything you are having a hard time with. He also said that Christ's suffering was like a long line of people. He suffered for each one of us one by one. He knows exactly what you are going through at any given moment. So, all we have to do when we are scared or feeling lonely is to remember that Christ is there beside us and always will be. We have our constant contact.
Now that I have her all taken care of, she is asleep. The final goal. With all of these things helping her, she has overcome the storm to get a good night's sleep. I only hope that I can make the right choices and remember all of the things I have going for me to reach my final goal.... the celestial kingdom with my Heavenly Father.

Tears of Joy and Sadness

This was going to be like any other ordinary night. I was going to watch a movie. Was... Then, I happened to get on Facebook. I started looking through all of my old photos. Some of them made me smile, some made me laugh, and some brought tears to my eyes. Talking to friends from what I came to know as home, I realize how much I miss it. It is nice being back in Texas. I am getting a nice tan, I run during the week, and I have watched just about every good movie we own (we have A LOT of good movies). When I went to Utah everything changed. My short hair has grown long, I dress differently, I talk differently (I never thought I would say "for rude"), I think differently, and I think I act differently. People here, my family especially, think I should be that same little girl that left them last August. I am not that girl anymore. 
So here I am enjoying myself looking through all of the pictures of me through time. Then, I get to the ones of college life. Then, I start liking everything and sometimes unliking things so I can like them again like a friend taught me. Eventually pictures are put on my wall, a post on my wall led to a conversation, and we had the funniest group chat I have ever had. My somewhat crappy day has made a dramatic turn for the better. So here I am sitting in my room, at my desk, with my huge Dalmatian in my lap (she thinks she is a lap dog like my little terrier). I woke her up once because I was laughing so hard a tear rolled down my cheek and hit her in the face. Another time I actually started crying and she woke up long enough to lick my face to make sure I would be ok. I am fine. I just miss all of my friends who always made me laugh, who were there even when I was having a bad day, and who never fail to brighten my day. 
15 days until I am back in Utah. I have a friend counting down the days with me. Then, I will be able to start my BYUSA job, enjoy the mountains, try to not die with the thin air, find a job, and see all of the people I have been missing so badly. So instead of watching a movie, I am now jumping in my chair with my dog in my lap in excitement. Next thing you know, an hour has gone by. New people start liking your conversations, and the whole thing starts all over. I love these guys!

Dani showing me how much she loves me and how excited she is that we will see each other again soon. (I am glad she did this instead of getting undressed because she is also famous for doing that in all the excitement) What could be better than talking to friends as good as these?

If You Want to Laugh

This had me laughing so hard I hard tears rolling down my cheeks!

This had me laughing as well. I think I am a bad person because these made me laugh so hard... 

Wearing My Mask

Sometimes a duck describes me perfectly. What you see on top of the water is the duck looking calm and unruffled when under the water they are paddling like crazy to get anywhere. On the outside I show nothing but a happy, put-together girl, but underneath it all I am stressing over so many questions that I do not know if or when they will be answered. I am always so worried about what is going on, but unless you know me really well and can see underneath my well constructed mask you would never know. 

Making the Best of Life

Yesterday I got to spend some time with my best friend. The only problem was that I am different. We still get along so well and have so much fun, but in the car when we usually talk I found myself not knowing what to say. I looked out the window and realized how much I really missed Utah. Somehow in the eight months I was there it became a huge part of me. I let it get to me. Yesterday during our girls' day we went to Granbury and went around the square into all of the little shops. I am not a big fan of the little shops so I ended up only getting a scarf and some fudge. It was nice to be able to see Ashley anyways though. I think the heat got to me too. I am not used to the ninety degree weather in May anymore. I just got used to Provo weather, and now I am back in good old Texas. After our long day was over my mom and I went to Target and then went home. At some point in the car ride she told me one of the things she loved about me was the fact that I always try to be happy. When I went to visit my old high school last Thursday my old counselor told me that she loved how I had such a positive view on life. Many others have said things to this nature. That got me thinking, and I realize that I usually do try to make the best of whatever situation I am in. In junior high when I skipped a grade and had no friends, somehow I ended up enjoying it. In high school when things were hard and I had to change schools again I got through. My junior year when all of my friends were changing and some of my classes were pushing me to the edge of my sanity, I kept going trying to keep a smile on my face. Now that I look back at my high school experience I realize how much fun I had, how much I learned, and the importance of good friends, teachers, and counselors. After a whole year at BYU I look back with the same feelings. Yes, I went through some tough times whether it was ridiculously hard classes that no AP class could prepare me for, homesickness, or a rather unexpected turnout in my roommates, but I love it all. I grew from all of those experiences. I will keep a smile on my face even when it is hard not for me but for those around me. Sometimes we all just need someone in our lives that always smiles.